Skipper's Military Days Episode 4Diamonds
by 123cosmo4
Summary: Steak Knife bribes Rico with explosives to eliminate Skipper and the others./Meanwhile, Skipper and Kowalski stay in Ecuador with Princess Addie while a dangerous new enemy stalks them...
1. Chapter 1

Skipper's Military Days

Episode 4:

Chapter 1- A Nobody

Steak Knife managed to find land about an hour away from the Andes mountains. He had never lost so much dignity. His magnificent plan to get military plans was a failure and he needed those plans. He was wanted all over the world and couldn't get to Arctica if everyone was after him. Well, even though he was driven away by TJ and his team, there was more than one way to get military plans. Perhaps he could get one from the nearby village. There had to be someone there that knew… He had been to Ecuador quite a few times and knew that a village of otters lived there. They were of pretty high standard and probably knew a lot about world power.

The Red October was safely parked in a peninsula somewhere out of sight. The ship was recovering from the tar incident and was ready for duty. The village was somewhere about a mile away. A village containing mostly otters meant that he would stick out no doubt. They would probably recognize him too so he made sure to smooth down his feathers over most of his scars to look somewhat normal. Well, these days penguins lived in places that weren't Antarctica.

Steak Knife thought that the town was ahead, but apparently he was wrong. Instead there was a murky pond. It was so…filthy, but there was no way around it. It seemed to go on forever in both directions. Desperate times call for desperate measures. He was about to dive in when something rippled in the water. He froze himself from jumping in and watched the ripple. What on earth was that? The water kept rippling and then a green FIN stuck out of the water. He stared and watched. It was just unnatural for something so alien to be here. Then a fish head appeared out of the water.

Oh, it was just a fish. He was about to dive in again when the fish jumped out of the water and landed on the shore. He leaped back with alarm and saw that the fish didn't land. It was FLYING like a flying fish. It landed in a nearby tree and then leaped down at him. He felt the sharp familiar teeth of a Parana sink into his wing. He froze and retrained from pulling it away. Pulling away would just make its teeth just rip off his wing because they wouldn't let go easily. He held out his wing and watched it suck hungrily at his blood. This wouldn't be a problem. He tried to carefully pry it off. This little monster would pay alright.

Then another one sprang out of the water and fastened itself to his shoulder. He fought to try to free himself and then another one was stuck to him. They were crawling out of the water by the many and they crawled on to shore, ready to attack. How would he get out of this one? He would have to go the hard way out. Steak Knife slowly backed away until they all sprang at once. He reached out and jabbed at one so it fell off. Where that one fell off, another ne replaced it. There were just so many and the sharp bites from each one were so sharp that he could barely think straight. He had never seen Piranhas that jumped out of the water before and attacked on land. There had to be some way to get them to let go. There was only one thing left to try now that never failed. Perhaps these monsters could understand him.

"One penguin just isn't enough for dozens of hungry piranhas, now is it?" Steak Knife said in a relaxed tone. "One can easily turn to four, yes?"

Apparently they did understand. They didn't let go, but their eyes concentrated on their prey instead of where they were biting. He looked at each one in turn and they were just as dazzled as anyone else.

"I know where there are four penguins you can very well enjoy," he continued. "And only I know where they are. I can show you if you let me go, yes?"

Still, they didn't let go. They couldn't care less about what he had to say. This was surely the end. They would just keep sucking until he was too weak to stand.

All their brown eyes turned to the right and they stared at something. Steak Knife looked too and saw a penguin standing there, watching everything. At first he thought with alarm that it was one of the four that were after him, but he looked quite different. He looked curiously at Steak Knife and then down to the Piranhas. He held up a wing and the Piranhas were suddenly loosening their death grips. They all let go and slithered like snakes back into the water. That was all it took to keep them off. They looked at this other penguin like he was a savior. The penguin regurgitated a smaller fish for them and tossed it to them. All of them mobbed each other for it and disappeared into the water.

Steak Knife rubbed the bites that were all over his body and was relieved to see they weren't very deep. That little penguin just saved his life. He didn't normally feel gratitude to anyone, but that was because no one ever thought we was worth saving.

"Piranhas that fly are common here, yes?" he said coolly. "They seem to know you."

The penguin nodded.

"Then you must be a native. Why are you a native here in a village of otters? Alone, yes?"

He nodded again, not because he was shy, but for some other reason.

"So you might possibly know about the military around here. Is there a base nearby?"

The penguin seemed to think and then just shook his head no. Steak Knife lost interest in the little penguin and focused back to the Piranhas. They were such deadly fish and could have easily killed him if this little silent waste of space hadn't come along. Maybe he wasn't much of a waste of space after all since he could control those Piranhas. All they needed for a bribe was food. What if that food just happened to be four military penguins that were tracking him down all over the world? Surely he could send them a little surprise party… What a brilliant idea! If they got anywhere near this pond they would be doomed. All thanks to this little penguin for saving him. Wait a minute. The sun was dawning on a new idea. Perhaps this little penguin could assist him in a gruesome new plan. These flesh eating piranhas could take out four enemies once and for all. He knew that the four of them survived that dynamite explosion. At first he thought it was just a stupid feeling, but it nagged at him all night so he couldn't sleep. The feeling wouldn't go away and to back up correct instinct, he barely saw the Well Deserved on the horizon when the Red October was blocked up with more tar. He managed to put plenty of distance between them and then parked the ship here in a tiny area where a huge freight ship couldn't even dream of landing. They were tracking him down all right and interfering with everything he had been trying to do. Since this little penguin was the only one that could control them, there would be no chance of them surviving when he nearly didn't. This time, this little silent penguin wouldn't be there to save them.

"You have captured my attention and I was wondering if you could help me with something," Steak Knife explained. "Tell me your name, yes?"

First, there was silence. Then the penguin strained to say "Rico." At least, it sounded like Rico.

"You don't talk much, that's for sure," Steak Knife said lightly. "Unlike me of course."

Rico walked a little closer and then stared directly into Steak Knife's eyes, looking for something. Steak Knife found that to be a little odd. No one ever just stared into his eyes unless he told them to do so. He accepted the staring for about ten seconds or so before he felt uncomfortable and looked away.

"I need some help getting rid of a few penguins that have really been on to me. They are really starting to annoy me because they are trying to catch me all the time. Perhaps you could help me get rid of them."

Rico blinked with confusion.

"I mean give the piranhas a little snack," he explained with annoyance. "Certainly you could do that for me, couldn't you? They are very… worth getting eaten and certainly don't look like a softie. You could do this task without problem, couldn't you?"

Rico nodded. He folded his wings and looked at Steak Knife, obviously wondering what was in it for him. Steak Knife already knew how to solve this problem. It would be easy because all Rico's attention was already on him to start.

"I want you to relax and just think about this wonderful offer," he said in that soft voice that made Rico's eyes droop a little. "There are only advantages. To see all these advantages, just…just…"

He trailed off when Rico looked away and tried to jump on a butterfly that flew by. Steak Knife had never seen anyone refuse his hypnotic stare and assuring words, not even Skipper. Rico looked away just for a butterfly. He tried again after he got Rico's returning attention, but then he looked away again. Obviously this penguin had a tiny attention span and wouldn't listen to hypnosis because he didn't concentrate on it. He would have use another method of getting what he wanted that suited Rico more. He quickly grabbed Rico by the shoulder as he ran after another butterfly.

"What is something you like?" he asked. "Something that you want more than anything?"

"KABOOM!" Rico screamed and pretended that a bomb exploded. Steak Knife was trembling from Rico's loud outburst and he understood what this penguin wanted and he had exactly that.

"Follow me to my ship," he instructed. "I think I have a bomb or two for you. Remember, give me what I want and you can have lots of…ahem…kabooms."

Rico nodded excitedly. Steak Knife led Rico through the woods and back to the ship. This was working out better than he thought, even though this penguin was extremely annoying and obnoxious. Leading him back to the ship would be a big risk in case Rico knew who he was, but the piranha attack unruffled all his feathers so all those scars were noticeable again. Rico would have recognized him by looks. In more obvious thoughts, Rico couldn't talk and give away anything. He only said a random word every once in a while. Finally, they made it back to the ship. It was still in its tucked away place on the peninsula and untouched. Rico stared at the ship with excitement for a few moments before turning away with lack of interest.

"Well, come on," Steak Knife said and climbed up the rope ladder.

Rico inched up shortly after and paid little attention to the animal pelts lining all the railing on the bow of the ship. He looked directly into the fierce eyes of a wolverine and instead of fear, he just cocked his head curiously and then moved on to the next one. Didn't he even wonder why all those pelts were there? Skipper sure did for sure. Oh, he forgot. This penguin didn't have a brain in his head, just a bunch of cotton fluff. When he did think, what was he thinking of? At least a brainless idiot like this wouldn't question the task Steak Knife laid out for him.

"Come on, Rico," he pressed and pulled Rico downstairs when he wouldn't come. "Kabooms are down here."

Finally they reached the back room. Steak Knife opened the door to the bomb storage of the ship. There were lots of empty boxes and almost all the ammo was still in the Andes. There was only one box left with the remaining boxes. Rico pounced on the remaining box and pulled out what was inside. All that was left from the bombs were useless fireworks. They even came in a cute little package with pretty colors on it. Fireworks were still explosives though, right? Rico was completely absorbed in his own little game and pretended to light off all the fireworks at once.

"Kaboom!"

Steak Knife snatched up the fireworks and Rico whined with protest, begging like a dog to get them back.

"Not yet," he held them close and slipped a few that fell out back in the package. "Remember what you have to do. Find the four penguins and eliminate them. They go by the names of TJ, Austin, Skipper, and Kowalski. The younger ones are about the same age as you. One of them is trim and the other, Skipper, is a little short and fat. TJ is blue and white and Austin only has one eye. Impossible to miss and even someone like you could eliminate them, yes?"

"Uh-huh," Rico replied and kept begging.

"Do not disappoint me," Steak Knife ordered and then handed Rico the fireworks. He looked at them excitedly and then shoved them down his throat and swallowed them without a problem.

"You ate them?"

Rico then regurgitated them back up without a problem. This penguin had a very…strange abnormal talent which made him by far the strangest penguin Steak Knife had ever met. He thought perhaps he was wasting his time with this idiot, but then Rico headed towards the exit of the room with a purpose.

"Remember to eliminate them," Steak Knife called after him.

Rico nodded and then went to find these four penguins.


	2. BONUS: Cosmo's Writing Journal

Cosmo's Writing Journal

"Good day to folks. My friends that read my actual longhand novels that are not fan fictions know what a Cosmo's Writing Journal is. It is when I tell you about the story and whatever crosses my mind. For a start, I am watching 18wanda (who writes fan fictions too) cook on the Wii. EW! A crab! Anyway, for a start, I am pretty bored today. It is around four and getting somewhat late. I am so hungry I might just starve because there are no snacks around here. Dang it, no snacks! PORQUA! I will just have to starve…

I am saying this because I am sure Gremmy is reading this right now. Gremmy, I am hungry. When you get home, just tell us so we can come over for lunch or pudding or something tasty. Wanda is starving too and we need food, entertainment, and a place to stay.

In other news of my life, I am going on vacation in just SIX DAYS! Chatanooga Tennessee will be fun. I wasn't to go rafting down a river. That sounds very fun. Okay, this is probably my 20th writing journal ever and I am supposed to be talking about the story, but you guys except Gremmy know nothing of my life so I am giving a little insight about it. Well, let's go to the story for a bit.

Well, I was first inspired to write this little number when I was riding my bike through a sprinkler at Gremmy's. I was having extreme writer's block in my main novel and my others I was too bored to write so they have been collecting dust in my journal shelf. I was thinking about the fan fictions I read about the Penguins of Madagascar and watched the show so I thought, why not make my own? Mine is like an awesome prequel! I would like to say, the ideas all came naturally at the beginning. I am thinking about writing another fan fiction about the penguins. Hear me out on this one. It is back at the zoo and in current time where they belong and here's the situation. Kowalski, Rico, and Private get extremely lazy and don't do drills and other military things Skipper tries to drill them on. Then Skipper thinks they are not taking military seriously and boots them out of their base to fend for themselves. Then they go all over the zoo and try to bunk in with everyone. Review me if it's a good idea, okay? I really need to know. Well, that's all. Remember to always never eat eggplant cause it is sick man!


	3. Chapter 2 Princess of Diamonds

Chapter 2- Princess of "Diamonds"

Coming in the coast of Ecuador was a small ship, at least it looked like one at first. As it came nearer it looked like a cruise ship, then finally a freight ship. Someone on a nearby ship saw it coming and steered her boat straight towards it.

The Well Deserved rumbled as it parked deep into the sand of a beach. It crashed down a few trees and then came to a stop. TJ looked at the land like it was home.

"Welcome to Ecuador, everyone," TJ announced. "There are just so many memories to remember here."

"Well, I researched Ecuador and it doesn't seen that great," Kowalski said and took notes on their surroundings. "There are penguin eating fish, cannibal bats, wild cats, and lots of bugs."

"That's just what they want you to think," TJ replied and looked at Kowalski's notes. He turned away with lack of interest. "We are going to find the kingdom of otters that live around here."

"What?" Kowalski said with disappointment. "Even you should know that a kingdom of otters living in the jungle is pure science fiction. That doesn't exist."

"Once again, that's what they want you to think. Ah, I remember those old days. I found the otters by accident and they took me into the King's house. I got lost in a hallway for a week surviving off dust bunnies."

"I have to agree with Kowalski on this one," Austin commented. "Skipper, surely you don't agree with such a preposterous idea?"

"Uh…" Skipper agreed it did sound a little stupid, but he didn't even know what an otter was. "It might exist."

"Well, team, suit yourselves," TJ decided uncaringly and disappeared down the anchor. "Just wait here and the jaguars and those cannibal bats you mentioned will pick you off. Who am I to keep you away from predators."

At first they all watched TJ disappear to the bottom and jump inside the Time Bandit to take down the river. The fishing boat started up and then started down the river. TJ didn't even look back to see if they were following. The three of them looked at each other and then jumped down the anchor after TJ. TJ already stopped the Time Bandit and waited for them to climb in. He knew they wouldn't stay on the Well Deserved in a dangerous rain forest.

"This river will take us straight there," TJ pointed out.

Kowalski and Skipper had never been in such an interesting place. They hung over the boat to get a close view of everything they passed. A little monkey jumped tree to tree above them.

"Oh, wow." Kowalski began to scribble down everything it did. "It appears to be some life form of…marsupial? No, that can't possibly be right."

Then another boat appeared on the river in front of them. It apparently saw them coming and parked sideways down the river so the Time Bandit couldn't get around. The boat was pure pink with little flowers all over it. IT was a very feminine boat with flowers, hearts, and clouds on it. Standing on the deck of it was a pure black otter with blue eyes. She was watching them and waiting for them to stop. TJ pulled on the levers so the Time Bandit began to slow down. It was getting closer and closer to the other boat and wasn't stopping very fast. They were all sure that the Time Bandit would hit the other one, but the black otter didn't even consider that possibility. She just kept standing there with her arms crossed and watched the black fishing boat coming straight for her. They were so close that they could read the boat's name, the Floral Addie. Finally, the Time Bandit stopped only about an inch from the Floral Addie. The otter reached out to touch the Time Bandit and then wiped off her fingers like it was too disgusting to even touch.

"Hey!" she shrieked. "What are you doing on MY river?"

"We were looking for the town," TJ answered politely. "You must be from it."

"Well, I don't care what you're looking for, just get lost," she ordered like she had authority over them.

"Why…" TJ squinted and then brightened up. "Princess Addie! I haven't seen you since you were tiny."

Addie didn't even try to be nicer. "I don't know you. I don't like strangers so get out of here!"

"We're just here to find a criminal." All of them were getting worked up, but TJ tried to remain calm. "We really need to go to town."

Addie jumped swiftly on to the Time Bandit and glare at them. "Well… What criminal are you after?"

"Steak Knife," TJ answered.

"Hmm…I have never heard of this Steak Knife," she said in response. "Strangers are not tolerated around here so get _lost._"

TJ said nothing and Skipper couldn't just stand there and watch this spoiled otter boss them around. He was fuming.

"Listen, otter, we will not get LOST, because we already are lost. We didn't come all this way just so you could tell us what to do."

"Hey," she said sharply and poked Skipper roughly in the chest. "Who are you to talk, fatso? I am the Princess around here and what I say goes. Your attitude is annoying me."

"Mine?" Skipper thundered and pushed her back roughly. "You have been bossing us around ever since you met us. We will not take orders from a spoiled brat like you who doesn't even know why we are here."

They stared into each other's icy blue eyes growling. Kowalski tried to be a miracle worker and stepped between them.

"I'm sure there has just been a misunderstanding here," Kowalski said nicely to them. "We can work this out."

Addie glanced over at Kowalski and was about to say something mean, but just stared. She didn't look at him with aggression and hatred like she did the others.

"So you're seeking a criminal, huh?" she confirmed. "Steak Knife… Perhaps I can lead you to my home."

Was this the same otter that yelled at them a minute ago? Skipper rubbed his eyes just to make sure.

"I'm sure this criminal is VERY important to catch," she continued sweetly.

"Oh, well, actually…" Kowalski glanced up from his notebook. "It is mostly important for Skipper than me. IF you want to know things, ask Skipper."

"Which one is Skipper?" she pressed and continued to stare. Kowalski pointed at Skipper without looking up from note-taking. Addie squinted with disapproval when she knew who Skipper was and then returned to staring. Kowalski was disturbed, but didn't say anything.

"So who are you?"

"Kowalski."

"I think that is a _great _name," she complimented and looked a little annoyed when he didn't even look up.

"So are we going to your town?" TJ asked annoyed. "We need to get there as soon as possible."

"I don't see why not," she decided. "It would be nice for you guys to…stick around for a while."

"Get your pinky-dink boat out of the way and we can go," Skipper growled.

Addie returned to her boat and began to move it out of the way. The Floral Addie led the Time Bandit through the river. Skipper couldn't believe what just happened. The most evil otter on the whole world completely changed just by looking at Kowalski. He glance up at Kowalski when it dawned on him and Kowalski was still taking notes like nothing happened.

"Did you see what just happened?"

"Um, I'm a little busy-"

"No you're not!" Skipper snatched up Kowalski's notebook and pencil so he was forced to listen. "You're a nerd; tell me why Addie just went crazy for you."

"I didn't notice anything," he admitted and snatched his notebook back. "So she was being nice. Actually, I have to go to the Floral Addie right now to give an interview."

"Kowalski, no," he pleaded. "You will just encourage her to like you even more."

"I think you are overreacting. I am just learning more about the otter race. By the way, watch it before you call me a nerd."

Kowalski jumped off the edge of the Time Bandit and splat on the purple deck of the Floral Addie. Skipper couldn't let Kowalski go like this. It was up to him to protect Kowalski from this terrible otter. He jumped after Kowalski. Addie saw them, just Kowalski actually, and brightened up.

"Hello, Kowalski!" she squealed with joy. "It's been so long!"

She immediately pulled Kowalski off the ground and just pushed Skipper down again. She swung Kowalski around and hugged him. He backed away with confusion.

"It's been…according to my calculations, only 32 seconds exactly…35 now."

"It's so nice you want to spend time with me," she continued.

"If by that you mean let me interview you about the otter species," he replied and pushed her off.

"Sure, _Kowalski."_

Skipper just folded his wings and growled silently the whole worthless interview. The whole time Addie just stared at Kowalski longingly and answered the questions uncaringly, throwing in lots of compliments that Kowalski didn't deserve.

"Well, that's about it," Kowalski replied. "Thanks for the interview."

Anytime, Kowalski…Hey, look! We're almost there! See?"

Instead of forest background, they could see the beginning of little houses lining the river. Skipper had never seen such a civilization. Check that, he never even saw a town before. The place was crawling with otters of all different colors living their lives.

"So you live here?" Skipper guessed.

"Of course not," Addie shot back defensively. "I don't live with peasants."

"According to the living standards of this town, you must live about 5.72 miles….north."

"That's right, Kowalski!" she answered with another hug. "You are so smart."

"GrrrrrrRRRRR!"

What was Skipper when Kowalski had this otter friend? That brainiac didn't even know he existed anymore. Hopefully they would get news on Steak Knife and then be on their way like old times.

"This is where I live," Addie introduced and pointed to the world's biggest house on a hill. It was so huge that now Skipper believed TJ when he said that he got lost on a hallway for a week.

"Great, we can take it from here, _Princess_," TJ decided. "We can talk to the King ourselves."

"I'm sure my otter friends can help you find this Steak Knife," Addie promised. "So you are going just to sort things out?"

"Yes we are," answered Skipper gratefully. He never wanted to see Addie ever again.

"Well, this meeting sounds boring to me, don't you think, Kowalski?" Addie said brightly. "I have a brilliant idea. Why not you come spend the day with me?"

Skipper felt pure loyalty when Kowalski refused. "I don't think it would be fair to leave my team. I don't want Skipper to go alone."

"Skipper can come too," Addie insisted, desperate to keep Kowalski with her.

"Our team needs us," Skipper refused. "Kowalski is right."

"I don't care if you two have fun," TJ said to Skipper's disappointment. "You kids go have fun."_  
_"I'm not a-whatever."

"Come on, Skipper, it will be fun," Kowalski pleaded. "I don't really want to go to a meeting anyway.

"Fine," he growled. "I'll come."

"Fantastic," Addie said with false enthusiasm.


	4. Chapter 4 Evil Plot Unfolds

Chapter 4- Evil Plan Unfolds

"I'm sure you will like to come with us," Skipper said to Rico who was staring at the rippling water the Time Bandit made as it travelled down the river. "We travel all over the world. I for instance come from Antarctica. I didn't even have a life before I joined."

Rico nodded and kept staring at the water.

"We need to go wherever," Skipper continued even though Rico didn't seem interested. "Steak Knife has a plan to take over the world and we have to stop him."

Rico nodded with sudden interest. If Skipper didn't know Rico better he would have thought that Rico _knew_ Steak Knife somehow… No, or else Rico would have "said" something.

"Skipper!" Kowalski exclaimed. "I see another monkey!"

Skipper had no interest in monkeys whatsoever, but he still felt a little guilty for pushing Kowalski down that hill. He joined Kowalski at the edge of the boat to stare at the monkey jumping through the trees. Ever since they left Addie for today, Kowalski was completely back to normal.

TJ was looking at a map and Skipper and Kowalski were staring at the monkey. No one was watching where the Time Bandit was going. There was a fork in the river up ahead and it went two ways. Rico knew this river, every twist and turn in it. The right path would take the Time Bandit all around the outskirts of the otter village, but the left would take them deep into the rain forest and the boat would float right into the lake full of flying piranhas. All of them would be devoured in seconds, just like Steak Knife wanted. He slinked over to the steering wheel of the Time Bandit. They didn't notice so he turned the boat to the left.

He knew that he couldn't be there when the Time Bandit reached the piranha lake or they wouldn't attack. He knew them too long. They would have to fair it out alone. He knew exactly where the Red October was parked from memory and the others would never notice if he left. He dived off into the river and no one noticed. He wondered what Steak Knife was doing alone.

While TJ's plan to hunt down Steak Knife was in session, Steak Knife's own plan was unfolding. He waited impatiently for Rico to eliminate them and he knew that Rico would do anything to succeed in this task. Steak Knife did not expect to see the recognizable Lieutenant Austin on duty _alone._ He knew that Rico would probably handle the other three with piranhas, but there was one that had to go right now. Steak Knife watched Austin scout around by the shore that ended Ecuador, getting closer and closer to where the Red October was parked.

Austin could just make out something red and rusty parked on a peninsula by the ocean. He slid down the slope thinking it was an illusion and he couldn't possibly have such a stroke of luck, but it was definitely a ship. He got closer and closer and studied every detail of the red October. He was so close that he could see every pelt hanging over the bow of the ship and the rusty painted letters that marked the Red October. Steak Knife surely couldn't be far from here. He felt like a very faithful Lieutenant after discovering this. He would have to find TJ and the others to scope this out. There was no way he could barge in there like Skipper did and expect to solve the problem by himself.

"It is just depressing thinking you want to be captain someday, but it will never happen."

Austin froze at the sound of that soft voice and slowly turned around. Steak Knife was standing there and stroking a platinum silver sword. Austin knew what he intended on doing with it.

"I'm sure TJ will think highly of you for coming alone right to my ship," he continued. "I sure do. I will tell you right now that this won't hurt a bit, just like a little pinprick."

There was no warning. Steak Knife lunged out suddenly and Lieutenant Austin didn't stand a chance.

Rico did not know why Steak Knife encountered Lieutenant Austin at first and he soon found out why. He watched the whole scene with despair from a tree top and felt betrayed. The gruesome scene didn't bother him at all, but he thought that Skipper and the others were evil stalkers because that was what Steak Knife taught him to think. Now he understood who the real enemy was and no amount of explosives was going to change that. After spending the day with Skipper and the others, he learned that they were really the good guys in this cesspool of crime. They were trying to hunt down Steak Knife for a reason. Skipper actually thought of him as a friend instead of a pet, something that Steak Knife didn't.

And just like that, he betrayed them. He watched Steak Knife clean the blood of his sword and he looked like he accomplished something great. Rico couldn't give Steak Knife the satisfaction of the others dying too. He had to stop them before they were torn to shreds.

Skipper and Kowalski finally got their friendship back together. They eventually forgot about Addie for the time being and were friends against the world like things used to be.

"Did you know that otters can swim for days without breaks?" Kowalski asked Skipper while, of course, taking more notes.

"No and I don't care," replied Skipper lightly. "So I assume you have noticed now about Addie, yes?" He stopped talking when that last statement sounded just like something Steak Knife would say. Luckily, Kowalski didn't notice.

"I have," he agreed. "I guess that isn't really a bad thing. I mean, this calculator is tight…yo?"

"Just be a nerd. Cool lingo isn't really your thing. We can play with snap rocks. They are pretty fun."

"Spark rocks?"

"They explode when you drop them," Skipper explained and tugged Kowalski along. "Rico will surely let us play with them."

"I haven't seen Rico in a while," Kowalski said.

The two of them wandered around the deck in search of their lost buddy. They found no trace of Rico. TJ looked up from the map and noticed them searching.

"Have you seen Rico?" pestered Kowalski. "We want to play with spark rocks."

"Why…no I haven't," answered TJ. "I was sure Rico was with you two."

"No," Skipper said confused.

They searched the Time Bandit thoroughly, but found no signs of Rico. Did he go for a swim or something? Perhaps he just took off. Rico was just the penguin to disappear without a trace. While he looked for Rico, Kowalski just happened to glance at TJ's map while he was reading it.

"Your map is upside down," Kowalski pointed out and flipped it over the other way. "Your navigation has been wrong this whole time."

Kowalski looked at the river ahead and then back at the map. He located their current position on the map and looked up worriedly. TJ and Skipper gathered anxiously.

"We took the path on the right, didn't we?" he wondered nervously.

"Of course," TJ answered.

"…Sure," Skipper agreed.

"But no one actually _saw_ us turn right?"

"I was looking at my map," admitted TJ.

"We were looking at monkeys," Skipper added.

"According to my calculations, we are not taking the right path. Every turn we pass is not computing on this map, but matches perfectly with the path on the left. We are taking the left and at the end of this river is a lake… Piranha lake."

"We can just turn the boat around and go back," TJ decided calmly. "Prianhas are absolutely no threat at all."

"Are you sure?" Kowalski pressed nervously.

"Of course I'm sure," TJ replied confidently, making Skipper feel less anxious.

After their decision, the river began to widen and the current was less strong. The Time Bandit relied on the current to go and slowed down when it weakened. They floated into a wide circle: the lake. This lake was crawling with piranhas that they couldn't see because of the murky water. Kowalski began to turn on the propellers and turn the boat around. It turned slowly. Skipper stared into the water with fear. Kowalski said that piranhas were fish with very sharp teeth and obliviated anything that fell into the water. The Time Bandit was high off the ground though so they surely were safe.

A greenish gray fin spiked out of the water like a shark. Skipper leaped back with surprise. It was _huge._ One turned to two and then half a dozen, then a dozen, and then a _baker's_ dozen. TJ didn't seem the slightest bit worried though.

"They can't get us up here," TJ said. "They need water."

"Oh."

TJ walked to the front of the boat leaving Skipper staring at the currents the Time Bandit left behind. The piranhas were very interested in the boat. They crowded around it. Their fins circled the boat which was scary. They looked like they were interested in the boat. He saw a pair of wide unblinking eyes looking at him. These fish were more than just interested, the fish was looking at him like he was prey. He was about to join TJ and Kowalski up front when it jumped clear out of the water and landed on the deck. Instead of flopping around it slithered across the ground like a snake. Skipper gasped with horror and pressed himself to the rail. Its teeth were giant piercing needle of death.

_Fight it! This is what you were trained to do. This isn't as scary as Steak Knife._

Skipper couldn't do it. Its fangs glittered in the sunlight and could pierce right through his skin. He bolted as fast as he could to TJ and Kowalski. They stared at the piranha with disbelief.

"I thought they didn't jump," he panted.

"They don't," TJ answered worriedly.

There was a splash and then another grayish green predator fish landed right between them. It tried to clip its fangs on Kowalski, but he flinched and it missed. _Snap!_ It grabbed thin air. It tried to grab Kowalski again, but TJ grabbed its tail so it whirled around and barely missed him. He tossed it back into the water safely without getting bitten. Skipper knew they were under attack and he remembered Elise's training against something as unexpected as this. He reached out of the Time Bandit and almost fell out. He supported all his weight on a tree branch and ripped it down. The branch snapped so suddenly that he tumbled on to the deck of the Time Bandit with a huge branch. A piranha rained out of the sky with its fangs ready to bite. Skipper pushed the branch out so it bit the stick and he threw down the stick to the side so it hit the deck. It let go of the stick and pounced for Skipper again. He hit it like a baseball back into the water. Another one shot out after it and it almost bit into his shoulder, but he thrust the stick and hit it away. The bit on contact he could tell. The moment Kowalski and TJ tried to push them away the fangs of the piranhas fastened into them and wouldn't let go. Their only chance against them was a stick. Skipper quickly reached out and ripped off a branch and tossed it to TJ. He had to get one for Kowalski. He grabbed on to a branch and pulled on it desperately. It was bursting with life and would not give. Kowalski desperately needed one so he pulled harder.

All of a sudden the branch cracked with sudden force and Skipper lost his balance. He lost contact with the Time Bandit and was falling. Landing in the water would be certain death and his life flashed before his eyes. He clung to that branch as tightly as he could and expected it to hit the water. The branch slowed down and then stopped. He opened his eyes and clung to it as tightly as he could. He was only about two feet from the water and the branch bounced unsteadily under his weight. He waited a few seconds before climbing up to the top just as the piranhas started jumping up. He had to get back to the Time Bandit and fast.

Skipper felt something touch him. He jolted and jumped around. Rico flinched with surprise and Skipper felt relaxed to see that it was only Rico.

"Where have you been?" he demanded. "We're under attack."

Rico obviously didn't answer. He just looked at Kowalski and TJ fighting for their lives on the ship deck. He looked extremely guilty, but there was no way this could be Rico's fault. That didn't matter though.

"What are we going to do?" Skipper exclaimed and snapped to get Rico's attention. "We have to get out of here. Do you have something that can help us out?"

"Uh-uh," Rico answered.

"Give me what you got," Skipper ordered and shook him like a doll. "We need things."

Rico coughed up a slobbery disintegrating calendar, a rag, a picture frame, and the end of a garden hose.

"More!"

Rico then puked up a shiny box of something. Skipper picked up the slobbery box and something thin and tall fell out with a sparkly tip. It was a box of fireworks! If they lit off the fireworks perhaps something would come to their assistance or they would scare away the piranhas. He was about to take them out of the box, but Rico snatched it and held it close. Skipper tried to get them back, but he just backed away and clutched them tighter.

"We need them!" Skipper insisted. "Hand them over."

Rico looked down at them and then slowly handed them to Skipper like they were such a burden to lose. Fireworks needed fire to light.

"We need to light them somehow," Skipper said. He noticed Rico fidget a little. "Okay, you have something."

Rico puked up a box of matches. Skipper didn't understand how he could swallow all that stuff, but that was very useful at a time like this. Skipper lit the match on a tree and then lit every firework in the box. There was a sizzling sound for a few seconds before fireworks exploded into the air, all at once. They exploded in beautiful flashed of color and made enough noise to shake the ground. The piranhas were very startle by this sudden noise. They had never seen or heard fireworks before and their noise was worse than thunder. They retreated back into the water by the dozens until they were completely gone and the water stilled. The plan worked. Skipper and Rico jumped down on the deck of the Time Bandit. They checked all areas of the Time Bandit and found no piranhas remaining.

"That was a close one," Kowalski panted. "I…was sure we were…goners."

"I have never ever seen piranhas that could fly so far out of the water," TJ said. "They were so vicious. All it took was fireworks to make them go away. Fireworks that came from nowhere."

"It was my idea," Skipper said quickly. "And…well…Rico helped."

"Really? Well, I change my mind about this…Rico. Welcome to the team, Rico."

Rico nodded shyly. Skipper knew what was coming next.

"Skipper, I also made the right choice in putting you on the team. You are a prodigy and a natural leader. I will have to make that a good mark in your record."

Skipper tried to think of something modest and heroic to say, but couldn't think of anything. He just nodded like Rico did. He waited to hear some other good news when there was a loud splash and a piranha landed on the deck of the Time Bandit. It wasn't just another piranha, something was very different about it. IT didn't have that greenish glow to it that the others had, but a sickly gray look to it. Its eyes were clouded over with white clouds and it stared at nothing. It came alone and without any others. It was so different that everyone just stood back with alarm. It slithered around in a crooked way and then stopped in front of Skipper. He was frozen to the spot, clutching the rail tightly. The fish wasn't looking at him so perhaps it didn't see him. It came closer a little at a time until Skipper was cornered in the corner of the boat. Its fangs were yellow and needle sharp. He watched with fear as it came so close that he could reach out and touch it.

Skipper saw it leap at him and expected to feel its fangs impale into his skin. He felt a tiny nip and then opened his eyes. TJ reached out and grabbed the piranha's tail before it could bite Skipper. When it curled around he let go of it and jumped back. The piranha lunged out faster than TJ could jump back and fastened its teeth deep into TJ's chest. He didn't make a sound and just stared down at it. Pulling at it would be no good, but he couldn't just leave its fangs burrowed into him like that. No one moved, they just watched with the same fearful intensity as before. After a few moments its fangs began to loosen and it started to slacken. It got looser and looser until TJ could push it off easily and it slumped on the deck and died. It had some terrible disease and was deranged. They all just stared at it with terror and finally got enough sense to react.

"It had some kind of disease," Kowalski pointed out. "It doesn't look normal."

TJ stroked the bite carefully and smoothed away the blood that trickled down it. It was just another piranha bite and didn't look very serious. IT was nothing to worry about. All that mattered was this peril was over and they were all safe.

"Doesn't that hurt?" asked Kowalski and looked at the gaping bite.

"No, it could have been worse," he answered simply and pushed Kowalski away. "It will heal in no time. We should leave here as soon as possible. We still need to locate Steak Knife."

Now Skipper noticed it again with Rico. He looks so guilty and this was just the evidence he needed.

"You know Steak Knife," he accused.

Rico didn't try to deny it. He nodded confidently.

"I don't really care how you two happen to know each other, surely you know where the Red October is," TJ pursued. "We need to find it."

Rico nodded, but obviously didn't tell where it was. They would find that out when Rico showed them. The Time Bandit turned around and started to head back upriver towards the ocean.


	5. Chapter 5 Distant

Chapter 5- Distant

Steak Knife felt no emotion for a while. All he felt was a hollow feeling that made him really think about things. He did not welcome this emotion like he did others for it was something he could not control. He knew exactly what it was.

Depression.

Depression happened often and now it was worse than ever. At first he felt steady ambition for cruelly murdering Lieutenant Austin, but now he felt a cold emptiness that swallowed up all his emotions like a black hole. It made him ask himself the big questions.

Steak Knife felt a little relief when he looked down at Lieutenant Austin. He felt a flicker of warmth and affection for his fallen victim and actually felt very jealous that he couldn't feel fear. He couldn't really feel any strong emotion at all and it was very hurtful, much worse than any scar or injury. It was something that just couldn't heal. He just sat there beside Austin and reached out to stroke him after a minute. Cold.

Always cold.

Austin was not just a normal victim. No, he was much more than that. Steak Knife's eyes flickered when he looked deep into the gash on his throat that killed him. Steak Knife was not sensitive so he reached out and felt it carefully. He blinked and sighed shakily. He tried to make Austin feel more comfortable by being very gentle…generous. This was like dealing with Skipper all over again. With Skipper, Steak Knife tried to strike fear into the young penguin's heart so he would feel vulnerable and alone and to make him want attention, even from the very one that was going to kill him. This kind of generosity was different though…much different. As Austin got colder, Steak Knife pulled him closer and tried to keep him warm.

"Fear is a…strange emotion, yes?" Steak Knife said softly. "It feeds on itself and terrifies its victim even more than the actual threat. Luckily, it was over quickly. I wish it could be that way for me. Depression is like being trapped in a bottomless pit. There is no way to escape the darkness that consumes me. I blame everyone, even you."

Austin didn't respond. Steak Knife's wing moved up and rested on the red scar where Austin's left eye used to be. Then he stared at the ground and shivered violently. No matter what, he couldn't keep warm. He felt colder and colder until he was just too weak to even sit up. His bright green eyes that were usually glossy clear with steady emotion and control blurred with guilt.

"I forgive you more than I will ever forgive myself."

"High five!" Skipper exclaimed.

Skipper and Kowalski engaged in advanced high fiving, snapping and jumping all over the place with style. Rico watched them curiously until they finished with a snap. Then they looked at Rico expectantly.

"You're just not getting it," Skipper said. "High fiving will be our new thing, just the three of us. No, I think that is enough high fiving for now. We will drill again later."

"We have been out to sea for a while now," Kowalski observed and stared out the window of the bunk room. "I'm not certain when we will reach land, but I will get started on my latest experiment."

"I'll help," Skipper volunteered. "What are you doing?"

"I am testing the water density from different liquid resources by adding sodium chloride and Aluminum Sulfate to it. Very important."

"Uh… I just realized I'm busy," Skipper replied boredly.

"I know you don't understand a thing I just said," Kowalski pointed out. "It's okay, you don't have to help."

Skipper was so relieved to hear that. He was bored and was going to do something about it. Kowalski was out of the option, but Rico would still be a good playmate. He was pretty fun. What could they do? They could always do something Skipper had wanted to do for a long time: Sneak attack TJ. That sounded fun.

"Come on, Rico," he ordered. "Let's go attack TJ for fun."

Rico nodded eagerly and the two of them prowled out the door excitedly. Kowalski watched them leave and just rolled his eyes. He knew that they could never beat TJ in a fight in a million years.

TJ seemed like TV dinner to Skipper and Rico, who were watching him like a cat would watch a mouse. They were hidden on top off the mast and gazing down. Skipper didn't expect Rico would actually pay enough attention to follow him up here, but he was great at following orders. Skipper knew that both Kowalski and Rico looked up to him as the leader and that felt wonderful. He was capable of being a great leader and believed that with all his heart. How good of a leader was he compared to TJ though.

The thing about TJ was that he was always occupied with something. He always had a bright expression and a determined attitude that kept them going in the worst of situations. Today TJ seemed distant. He was doing absolutely nothing besides staring at the sea and hugging the rail lightly. He was expressionless and almost looked…depressed. Skipper felt scared just by looking at TJ in such a terrible state. They all understood that they were now without a Lieutenant, but it had been over a day. Skipper, Kowalski, and Rico were completely back to normal and moving on. TJ would normally tell them all to throw some dirt in it and move on, but this wasn't just sadness. Depression was different. It wasn't a thought, it was a bottomless pit that could consume anyone. It also consumed the feelings of those around depression. Skipper didn't understand any of this though. He didn't know depression was really a feeling. He didn't know how hard it was to climb out of that pit. What scared him most was that TJ reminded him of someone and it was hard not to cry at the though. TJ was exactly like Steak Knife.

Skipper couldn't bear to see TJ in such a state of depression that he tried to do what he intended to do in the first place. He attacked. He flipped around the mast and swung down quickly with Rico following. TJ snapped into focus and tensed, then jerking around at the last second and flinging them both to the side. Skipper did a backflip and landed perfectly and then jumped in at TJ who dodged him lightly. Skipper did a mighty leap and landed perfectly on Tj's shoulders. TJ's weight crashed under Skipper and Skipper easily pinned TJ to the ground.

_What did I just do?_

Skipper was barely a soldier and he just won a skirmish between the _captain._ This was no dream, but it sure felt like one. He was so surprised.

"Nice sneak attack, Skipper," TJ praised. "Nicely done."

TJ tried to throw Skipper off and managed, but with lots of effort. Skipper was lost in the moment.

_TJ is stronger than that!_

He seemed so weak for some reason. Rico didn't seem to notice, or care, and Kowalski wasn't here to see. Something was wrong and it linked between the feeling that TJ was becoming like Steak Knife. Steak Knife's neon green eyes always hid this strange feeling so he could barely see it, but now he saw the real thing. He couldn't let things go on this way.

"Captain TJ, I really think that perhaps-"

"Shhhh…"

Skipper listened immediately.

"Skipper, I think you are getting a little worked up. I would like to promote you."

"P-promote me?" he stammered.

"Skipper, I would like to promote you to my Lieutenant," TJ announced. "From now on, you are second in command. I believed in you from the start and you are ready for this position."

"I'm not," Skipper argued, even though he wanted this more than anything in the world. "I just became a soldier. I can't possibly."

"Yes, you can," TJ answered mysteriously. "I need you to be my Lieutenant."

"I accept," he replied quickly and saluted TJ loyally. "Lieutenant Skipper….Suits me."

"You are more worthy of this position than you know."

Skipper couldn't believe it. Only a few days ago he was a private and now he was a Lieutenant. That was almost impossible and he climbed there in only a few days. Why did TJ appoint a new Lieutenant so fast though? A better question, why did he pick an inexperienced rookie to be Lieutenant. That didn't matter. It happened and he had to tell Kowalski.

"


	6. Chapter 6 A Dirt Nap

Another Blanky

Skipper joined Kowalski and watched him working on his experiment. He watched and waited, just thinking about how he was presently Lieutenant. Kowalski apparently didn't notice how highly ranked he was now. Rico didn't really realize what a Lieutenant really was and didn't treat Skipper with any more respect, not that he was surprised.

"Skipper, I don't mean to be rude, but you're standing in my thinking place," he said without looking up.

"THIS IS NO TIME FOR EXPERIMENTS!"

Skipper snatched Kowalski before he could stop shaking and shook him like a doll.

"What?" Kowalski exclaimed in a panicked tone.

"We got a problem, Kowalski," Skipper answered and continued to shake him again. "Help!"

Kowalski slipped away and opened his notebook to take notes.

"Something is wrong with TJ and it is not good," he explained. "You will have no idea why I will say this, but TJ is just like Steak Knife. STEAK KNIFE I TELL YOU!"

"Calm down," Kowalski said, very aggravated. "I don't know what Steak Knife is like so just calm down."

"Depressed. Really depressed. This is bad…"

"I think you are overreacting," he assured Skipper.

"Rico!"

Rico nodded and sided with Skipper. Kowalski still didn't see any problem here. Skipper always was paranoid, but now he really went off the deep end.

"What makes you so sure?"

"Rico and I surprise attacked just like we planned and we…won. TJ was so weak that he couldn't even move me. Then, you are not going to believe this, but I am the Lieutenant now."

"The what?" Kowalski dropped his notebook.

"TJ-made-me-Lieutenant!" roared Skipper. "He has lost it!"

"I had no idea. Fine, we will go see what's up."

Skipper, Kowalski and Rico headed towards the sleeping bunks where TJ was. The moment they came in TJ's eyes opened and he just looked at them normally. He tried to get up, but for some reason he started shaking and couldn't get up no matter how much he tried.

"Something's not right about you," Kowalski commented.

Kowalski tried to help, but TJ was obviously too proud to accept help. He tried to shove Kowalski away, but was too weak to move him a single step. Kowalski started jotting down notes while Skipper and Rico anxiously glanced at the notes from both sides. They all had no idea why their leader was so weak.

"I don't need help," TJ growled. "I'm serious."

"TJ, how can you be too proud to accept help?" Kowalski shot back worriedly. "How can you not see that there is something wrong with you? "

"I do see that," TJ agreed. "I don't need help. I need to get some things straight. I would like to promote Skipper to temporary Captain."

"What?" Skipper exclaimed and couldn't resist shaking TJ. "I have only been a Lieutenant for five minutes. Now you want me to be CAPTAIN???"

"Someone has to pursue Steak Knife and you are the most reasonable for the job. I would also like to clarify that Kowalski, you are wasting your time. I am getting weaker from poison. I'm not depressed."

Skipper, Kowalski, and Rico stared at each other with helplessness. They didn't know what to do because it was true. There really wasn't anything they could do. What if TJ took a dirt nap on them? Steak Knife had nothing to worry about if TJ died. They were only a bunch of youngsters who had no idea what real military experience even was.

After a few impatient days of dreadful sailing, Steak Knife was finally approaching land. Hopefully. According to the map, Denmark was getting nearer. He had some unfinished business to do there. First, the Andes, then Ecuador, then Denmark. There were plenty of bombs to go around until he came as far north as he could. Steak Knife wasn't sure how wanted he was so it was always a good idea not to draw attention to himself. According to Skipper's mindless chatter, the Red October was a dump and could be spotted miles away.

Steak Knife always considered himself as bad luck prone, but this was getting ridiculous. Sure enough, he looked ahead and on the horizon he could see the smoke from ships and lots of them.

A blockade.

To make matters worse, he still had pelts hanging all over the place. He could never hide that in time. The whole ship was infested with them so he lived in a graveyard basically. This surely wouldn't be a problem though. Hypnosis could get him out of any situation.

Denmark was dominated by the main race of meerkats. Steak Knife wasn't sure where he would put a gob of meerkat pelts of things became that bad, but he would think of something. The Red October came to a stop as the ships closed in around it. They were so tall that his own ship looked like a little toy boat. Feeling closed in, he tensed up and prepared for sudden attack. Two meerkats jumped down from their ship and landed on the deck of the Red October. They didn't seem to be afraid. Instead they seemed interested. Interest is what made them targets of hypnosis. That was why Skipper was so easy to hypnotize.

"Meeting someone knew always comes with new surprises," he began coolly and relaxed a bunch. "I don't usually meet someone in a blockade." He noticed that they were not looking directly at him. "Now, it is always nice to look deep into the eyes of me. It builds confidence, yes?"

"You will hypnotize us," the first meerkat refused. "Your known for that. Being Steak Knife and all."

"How did you know it was me?" he asked with curiousity.

"We didn't at first," replied the second one. "Until you said yes. Your known for that too."

"I have got to stop saying that, y-…Never mind. I am also known for my threats. If you want to live, let me go in peace."

"Why not you come back to Denmark with us," the first meerkat offered. "We insist. We have been waiting for someone like you to come along for a long time now. We need you."

"Need me. Needing is such an inferior way to admit weakness. What do you need me for? Is it a good thing?"

"Yeah, of course," they answered gratefully.

"Well, my schedule is a little packed today. I know how much you must need me, but I have a life to live, yes? Need me some other time when I'm not busy."

"Well…" the second meerkat said. "I'm sure the five pounds of gold needs you too."

"The what?" Steak Knife was now listening.

"I said the gold. Yeah, we know you don't come cheap. We need something done. We know you're good at what you do and we need you to 'take someone out.'"

"There is no one better for the job," Steak Knife agreed.

Rico and Skipper were both staring at the map in front of them. They both stared at it blankly. Rico pointed to a spot on the map that was in the ocean.

"No you dingbat," Skipper growled. "Can you even read a map? We are obviously right over here. By that…splotchy thing."

Rico was persistant and pointed to the water again. Skipper was so aggravated.

"Near water? Gee, we must be getting close then!"

Rico, very offended, snatched the map away from Skipper. When Skipper wanted it back, he wouldn't give it. Even though Skipper was now Captain, Rico could not stand him.

"Give it, soldier," Skipper commanded.

Rico was much stronger and more superior than Skipper and he took advantage of that. Rico growled a warning and then couldn't take it any longer and pushed Skipper on the ground. Skipper was outraged at such insubordination and was about to attack Rico, who was expecting that, when Kowalski came on to the deck of the Well Deserved.

"Guys, we really don't need to be fighting." Kowalski sounded very quiet and weak. "We have been stressed lately, but really."

"Oh, who died and made you Captain?" Skipper shot back.

"HEY, I don't even want to hear that!" thundered Kowalski. " Infact, TJ died and made YOU Captain! You are stressed out and everyone can see that. Both of you! While you two have been off playing soldier, I was up all night because SOMEONE had to take care of TJ. Or have you guys forgotten? Skipper, I don't know how far you are going to push me, but I can't take much more of this. Just calm down."

It was true. Skipper was now the PERMANENT captain. He thought it was temporary, but no. He didn't realize at the time that he was so stressed that his friends had to take the heat. Kowalski was surprised when Skipper climbed over the edge of the ship and started inching down the ladder. Rico and Kowalski looked over the edge.

"I'm outta here," Skipper announced. He glared at them one last time before disappearing into the water.


End file.
